Thursday, March 11, 2010

Can Talent REALLY Outweigh Size?

First of all, I'll publish the link that has set me alight with anger and frustration:

It pains me to see a culture ostracize a human being because they are 'heavy' or 'unkempt' or 'fat'. The movies of high school, where even the so-called 'losers' have perfect bodies but are made fun of for having awful hair or acne. The movies and TV shows about college or real-life or not-so-real life or the thrillers or tear jerkers or the rom-coms all have one thing in common: the people are beautiful and perfect, except for the villain.

So it's great, right? To have an extremely obese girl showcasing incredible talent and being cast in movies and television shows as an important part of society is a step forward, isn't it? This may sounds harsh, but I don't think it is. The CNN article posted above quotes a writer saying she is talented but unmarketable; I definitely agree. She will never play an executive. She will never be an executive. She will never play the object of someone's healthy obsession or a passionate lover or a healthy, well-adjusted mom. She is fat, and female executives get where they are by being complete control freaks. A man will never look across a room and by stunned into sexual silence because of her amazing smile or the way she walks -- because she is obese and unhealthy. No one wants to see her naked, so veto on the sex scenes. Could she possibly play (or be) a great mom? No. Mothers chase their children round and round, all day long and running errands and cooking this or that and creating some type of crafty homework assignment while working a part-time job; that takes a hell of a lot of energy and calories.

I have never met this actress. I don't know her. I don't understand the way she lives or medical issues she may have. I am not friends with her family or close with her manager. But I will say that her weight is completely manageable. Without that self-control or self-discipline, how can one ever be a successful employee or boss or anything? I've learned the tough way that self-control is NOT overrated. I have discovered that discipline and desire to be something/have something/make something of yourself requires a very tight grip.

She does not have it, as evidenced by her obesity.

As someone without a thyroid, I understand what it is like to be completely powerless -- or to give yourself that excuse. I was born without the gland that secretes hormones for growth, muscle repair and most important, metabolism. I take a little pink pill every single day of my life to maintain those hormones so that my body does what it is supposed to. I was made fun of as a child for being fat AND as a teen and adult. I know what that pain is like, to not fit into anything... And then I discovered the fixer: STOP MAKING EXCUSES. What held me back in my education and my professional and my personal lives was the same thing that was holding me in my size XL's -- Lack of self-discipline. I was unwilling to tell myself "No, put down the damn cookies."

I paid a heavy price, as Gabourey Sidibe is paying now. She has realized (or soon will) that whether consciously or sub-consciously, humans respect, admire and appreciate those that can exercise self-control. She cannot. Those who exercise self-control are generally great people to work with. They are generally hard workers and know when to play and when to work. They set schedules they stick with and make commitments they fulfill. Any less than this and they do not succeed, plain and simple. That's how life goes.

And that's the way I see it.

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