Sunday, May 17, 2009
February 14th, AKA "Single Awareness Day"...
...For those of you who don't know, forgot, or are trying to burn the miserable thought from your bitter little minds, tomorrow is valentines' day. yes, yes -- the day where we pretend we're happy with what we've got, what we're getting and what we become. for weeks prior to this henious holiday, we are the prey of an insipid commercial love industry that attempts (with a certain type of glee that borderlines on malicious) to pass candy, cards, flowers, inanimate cuddly animals, diamonds, terribly unhealthy food and expensive accomodations off as true and undying love. yeah, you could say i'm bitter, skeptic, pessimistic, angry, crushed or any other type of negative or pathetic emotion, but i'm not -- i'm simply a realist. sure, send me flowers. yep, candy works too....and hell no i'm not going to turn down a 24-carat diamond tennis bracelet. all i'm saying is, don't do something like that and expect me to be set, satisfied and shitted for the other 364 days of the year, okay? true love means showing it when it doesn't matter, when there's no "you make it look good or that ass is grass" threat. it may sound cheesy, but regardless of the effort that's put into some idiotic holiday for the pure enjoyment of Patrick Heiniger, Harry Winston and that skank next door (yeah, the one with four bouquets all from different men), none of it matters unless you are truly committed for the rest of the year. so why not SKIP valentines' day, nix the flowers, return the diamonds/car/watch/whatever bauble and instead, have hot steamy animal sex? for goodness' sake -- i'm down.
Posted by Amanda Batty at 4:48 PM